Why I Am Not Adrianna: A Comprehensive, Bullet-Pointed Manifesto

1. My name is Andria N. Bobbig, as evidenced by this document, which I wrote.
2. Adrianna is a beautiful name that belongs to someone else. Possibly many people.
3. I have no memory of working at Guelph General Hospital from October 2023 to May 2024, nor of the vending machine on the second floor that always jams on the Twix.
4. My social insurance number is different from Adrianna’s. I am confident.
5. My cat’s name is irrelevant to this manifesto.
6. I have never once charted a patient note or held someone’s hand at 3am in a curtained bay. Especially that last one.
7. The stethoscope in my closet is decorative.
8. In conclusion, I am Andria N. Bobbig, and I look forward to your acknowledgment of this fact in writing.